Written by a lady for ladies:
So your man tells you he is not planning on having kids or getting married anytime soon as he is still sorting out his life. He tells you he wants to have his second degree, a proper house and a bigger car first. You sit there smiling with just a birth certificate thinking how ‘lucky’ a wife you’ll be?
With the little he has, you ask for Brazilian hair and designer shoes. He goes to work and then straight to class after work. He leaves you in pyjamas in the morning and returns to find you in the same pyjamas in the evening. While he studies you watch ‘African Magic’ and ‘Keeping Up with the Kardashians’. He comes back home to find pap and chicken in the microwave. The only serious conversation you ever have is about the type of groceries you guys need.
The only advice you give him is “Babe you need to buy a new pair of socks, the ones you bought last time are torn.” Nothing intelligent comes out of your mouth. No plans of making your own life better. Yes you’re are pretty, no doubt about that. But so is every second girl passing by.
Don’t you realise that you’re not doing anything a maid can’t do? When he finishes studying, the first thing he will do is REPLACE HIS MAID. Because then he would be able to afford a maid and have a PROPER WIFE who has brains.
That’s when we are going hear your infamous last words, “I was with him through thick and thin when he had nothing, now that he is successful he thinks I am nothing.” Truth is, yes, you’re right. You’ve always been NOTHING but a maid to him.
My dear, empower yourself to be the woman a successful man wants to have in his life. When God said in Genesis 2:18 that “it is not good for Man to be alone, I will make him a help an help meet for him”, I am sure He didn’t meet helper just in the kitchen or raining children. Make yourself a helper with class. The type of helper that a man that ran business ideas though, the type a man does nothing without consulting, the type whose prayer is the catalyst to her man’s progress. The Bible said in Proverbs 18:22 “whose findeth a wife findeth a good thing….”. Have you made yourself a “good thing” or are you the money sucking, idle, eating, gossiping and lazying around thing.
Remember, be the woman that a man needs not the woman that neess a man. Stand out.
Written from across the border by Jasmine Ofoegbu